Friday, July 18, 2008

Online dating secrets

OK. You have joined a couple of dating services and written a killer
profile. You’ve uploaded a good picture and now you are going to chat with a contact. What now? How do you start separating those who have real potential and those who don’t have any potential at all? You need to find out something about who this strange woman really is and not just who she wants you to believe she is. It would be nice if women wore labels like “Gold Digger” or “Daddy’s girl”….but they don’t so it’s up to you to find these things out and you can’t just ask direct questions.

You need to know what mistakes you can avoid making and how to
impress this lady if you decide you want to do that.

After you are past the initial small talk, ask her, “What are the biggest mistakes guys make when dating online?” Listen carefully to her
answers.She’s going to tell you a lot about herself and her views on men in general.
Next you should ask her, “What do you really think about online dating?” Now she will tell you if she has had any bad experiences dating o line and help you to avoid making the same things wrong.

Now for the all-important one…..”What caused the break up in your last
relationship?” If she puts all the blame on the guy, you should probably
move on to the next prospect. If she takes all the blame herself, you
should probably do the same. If she says the breakup was by mutual
consent or that the relationship just wasn’t right for either of them,
you’ve heard the right answer. Move forward but always with caution.
Asking the right questions will give you insight and make you more confident when you meet the lady for the first time.

Popular Online Dating Activities For Men

Heads up, gents. Online dating can open up new doors of opportunities with a little help from real world dating tips that work. Spice up your matchmaking with some of these ideas.

Looks Count
Comment on how attractive she is. Yes, women do want to know they are pretty, even if they’re online and you can’t see them and have no idea. So in your communications, ask questions that would help you know, but in an unobtrusive way like - how do you wear your hair? And then say how attractive that must look.

Kindness Counts
Point out nice things or the lemonade in life - nice things the other
person has mentioned, nice acts the person has done, good things on
the news latterly, etc. Be upbeat, and forget those lemons in life. Even in email a person can shout, by using all capital letters. So show manners and kindness. Keep swearing, unkind remarks, prejudice, etc. out of your communications. And “do unto others….” So add some helpful real-world tips that do work (a lot of the time
anyway) into your online dating equations. And come up on the positive side of romance - and enjoy more lemonade!

Online Flirting - A New Art Form

Many of the same things work for online flirting that work for “brick and
mortar” flirting and all relationships begin with successful flirting. Flirting
is an art that requires oozing confidence without being OTT. If you go
too far, she will label you “slimy” If you don’t go far enough, she will label
you “wimpy”. So how do you achieve that point half way between slimy
and wimpy and do it online without using eye contact or body language?
All you have is a computer an internet connection and membership in an online dating site, right?

1. Have fun! Be light-hearted, funny and entertaining.Make her eager to talk to you again. Flirting is playful.

2. Ooze confidence. Successful flirts have a positive outlook on life. You need to transmit the “feel good” factor. An optimistic attitude attracts females like honey attracts flies.

3. Compliment her…and do it often and sincerely. Nothing opens doors like making her feel good about herself. She will want to spend more time with you and if she pays you a compliment say “thank you”. Do Not be self depreciating.

4. Listen…listen….listen. Pay attention to what she says and ask appropriate questions. Get her to open up and talk about herself. Make her feel like she is interesting and that you are interested in her. Works wonders!
5. Don’t be rude. Flirting does not include being sexually explicit
nor taking offence if the lady isn’t responding to you. If she isn’t
interested, take the hint and move on to the next prospect. If you get a
lot of rejections, you should probably consider a different approach.

6. Send an email after you chat. This ranks right up there with
sending a thank you note for a gift and it is vital to successful flirting.

Don’t try to go too fast. Flirting is the first step to a successful sexual relationship.

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People have taken to online dating like a duck takes to water…because it works…or, at least, it can work. Women are, in general, terrified of meeting a man that she has been chatting with online. All they have heard about are the scary things that can happen…and, I must say, they have a right to be careful to the extreme. That’s not only wise but vital. So what’s a nice guy to do? You aren’t a pervert, a sexual predator, or a weirdo. You are just a nice guy trying to get laid.

You must be patient. Don’t press her for personal information like her real name or where she lives. Keep your conversations light and fun until she feels comfortable talking with you online. Don’t try to rush her into meeting face-to-face. She will think you are desperate or a pervert. Patience. Patience. Patience.

Be absolutely honest about your physical appearance and job. A good relationship has never been, and will never be, built on lies and deceit. Eventually she will find out the truth anyway and there you are back at
square one.

A picture really is worth a thousand words. Post many pictures of yourself doing your everyday activities and make them full body shots, not just head shots. If you were dating a girl in the real world she wouldn’t just see your head.
Once the discussion has been opened about meeting face-to-face for the first time, suggest that you meet in a very public place, during daylight hours and that she bring a friend with her. After all, you have nothing to hide. You’ve told her the truth about yourself and she has already seen a lot of pictures of you. The only thing left is to make her feel safe meeting you.

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1 comment:

The Relationship Company said...

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